Friday, October 7, 2011

The Rules of Facebook...if you ask me

The Rules of Facebook...
according to me

In no particular order
  1. If you wouldn't stand on a rooftop and scream your status, don't post it. 
  2. If you wouldn't show your grandmother the pictures you're posting, don't post them
  3. Facebook is a place to reconnect with friends, not make new booty calls.  If you want a booty call, try an actual dating site
  4. Do not air your grievances with someone on your Facebook status, if you have a problem with someone, go to them!  Don't hide behind your profile
  5. Remember, Facebook is supposed to be a fun and enjoyable "place"...keep your deep dark whoa-is-me crap to yourself.  Or, hey, write a blog.  LOL
  6. Don't over share, folks don't need, or care, to know your every bowel movement.  I'm exaggerating here a little of course, but seriously...the over sharing on Facebook is insane.  One post in  the morning, one in the afternoon'll do ya.  Just about any more than that and it's overkill
  7. For the love of Pete, don't add people you don't know, or barely know.  I have some life connection to the less than 80 people I have on my Facebook.  I'm related to at least 20 of them!  Just because someone sends you a request, doesn't mean they should be on your list. 
  8. If you need attention, look for a positive way to get it.  Facebook wasn't created for attention getting
  9. Chain-statuses!  OMG people.  Do you forward chain emails?  Do you hear people talk about how excited they get when they get chain emails?!  NO!  That mess goes straight for my trash folder!!  Why do you fill up the Facebook feed with that mess?!  
  10. Don't fuss about your job, it's not the place, and it's just tacky
  11. QUIT SENDING ME GAME REQUESTS!  If people wanted to play the ridiculous farming/restauranting/mafia games, they would sign up for them on their own.  I promise.
  12. Learn these simple grammar/spelling rules: You're = you are Your = shows possession There = is a place They're = they are Their = show possession Too = also To = preposition Two = a number, you know, after one comes two....these words are not interchangeable, please don't show your ignorance by thinking they are.
  13. Letters are not words.  How r u? is not How are you? ILY is not I love you  If you can't spell basic words, either learn, get spell check, or get off of the internet
  14. I have a potty mouth, however you may not know that from my Facebook.  Why?  Because I don't want to offend anyone on my friends list.  Cut out the cursing
  15. If you take a quiz, don't post it for everyone to see...that clutters up the news feed, and frankly if you care what Harry Potter character you are, I don't want to be your friend anymore lol
  16. Unless you're sure your friends want to attend your Event or join your Cause, don't invite's annoying.  Guaranteed, I hit ignore
  17. It's called a private message for a reason, use them!!  Private message for Private conversations.  If you don't want everyone on your list to know your business, learn how to email or call
  18. Facebook should be like your garage, it needs cleaning every few months.  Take half an hour and figure out if you still care anything about so-and-so's life, kid, pregnancy, husband.  If you don't, delete!  I promise no one will have hurt feelings, and if you do, grow up.  Maybe even go through your wall posts/statuses/likes, delete those that don't pertain to your life anymore.  Facebook is a reflection of your life
  19. It's football season, I know that.  I live in the south, Rah-rah, Go Team.  I just don't have the football spirit I'm told I should have.  I used to care, but man, that gets pretty stressful!  It can ruin your entire Saturday if you can't watch your team play, or they lose!  Anyway, don't post every play your team makes.  If we wanted to know every play, we'd turn on the television or the radio.
  20. Lastly, if you're under the age of 16, GET OFF OF FACEBOOK!  If you have to LIE to get a Facebook account...maybe you shouldn't have one!

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